“After a lot of negotiation, we are pleased to announce a team of twelve has been granted permission to activate Scarborough Reef from 28 March 2018 to 8 April 2018.
Territorial disputes are so last century so we have gained permission to operate from the organisations that really matter, Google, Amazon, Twitter, Apple, Facebook, Snapchat, Airbnb, Uber, Spotify and Tesla, (Tesla doesn’t actually have anything to do with the South China Sea but we just wanted to talk to them as they are really cool).
Interestingly none of them could figure out in this day and age why we need radios or would even want to go to Scarborough Reef. But we are excited to announce they are supporting us in setting up the world’s first fully remote DXpedition. We are setting up five remote stations on the rocks and then operating from the comfort of a five star hotel in Japan (with regular room service). In case you guys haven’t realised, the internet is where it is at. Accordingly there will be none of this risking life and limb on a bunch of rocks which may disappear during the operation because of climate change or a storm, going somewhere that doesn’t have a decent Chinese takeaway, or risk being shot at because people from a number of countries didn’t get the memo that tech companies rule the world.
In a further departure from other DXpeditions, we are not interested in working as many stations as possible. As such this is not is not going to be one of those school type events where everyone gets a medal because they are special. Sorry millennials (if indeed there are any millennial DXers), we know in particular you will struggle to cope with this concept.
Instead we understand that many of you have spent thousands of dollars on your stations, antennas and particularly amps and therefore you have earned the right to not only work us everyday but also multiple times everyday and even time and again on the same band and mode. Accordingly to get in the log and so get LOTW credits and/or QSL card you must work us at least ten times. However so you guys who don’t do this don’t feel left out, we will send you a special QSL card saying you must try harder next time.
Furthermore not only will a leader board be enabled to record how many times in total you work us, but we are going to have a special “worked the DXpedition on the same band and mode everyday” leaderboard/award. We know this takes great skill through using high power, incessant random calling, calling over the top of those seeking their first QSO and not listening to the DX station, to be successful and we want to celebrate your success with you.
For those without a big station (read married/poor/lazy) we are going to introduce an app you can use to log into a remote station in your country and work us. We believe this will also be especially popular with younger people (yes we live in hope there are young DXers) who are attached to their smart phones and want to be able to make their QSOs while out with friends. It will also assist busy people who do not have time to sit in front of their radio. In another innovation entering your callsign in the app will add it to a queue and it will transmitted to us in order of lodging. You will then get a message from the app to confirm when we have worked you with the time and date. As noted above you need to do this at least ten times to make sure you are in the log. Don’t worry we have checked the rules and there will be no issue with getting DXCC credit as the rules say as long as you are happy your QSOs are ethical it will count and whoever let ethics get in the way of a DXCC credit anyway? (By the way you guys with the big stations need to remember using a remote receiver located on the edge of your town to avoid the noise of inner city living is against the rules and therefore clearly unethical – go figure).
Alternatively you will be able to send us multiple QSO requests through Facebook, Snapchat, Twitter, or Google Plus (yes apparently people still do use that) to meet you on the air at a time of your choosing. For the old fashioned operator we will be monitoring the DX cluster so we will see your pleas for us to change band/mode, or only work your region etc. We will also be regularly announcing on all platforms what frequencies we will be on and where we are listening so no one has to use that big black knobby thing on the front of their radio. As with territorial disputes that is so last century.
Finally we also know using your own callsign can get boring after a while. Therefore we would encourage those of you in the log multiple times to also use the callsigns of your family members, or guys you know who aren’t interested in DXing now but might be one day so should be in the log just in case, or any secondary, club or special contest callsigns you have or know of. We understand you want to share the love and the entertainment shouldn’t stop simply because you have worked us with your own callsign 47 times.
We can’t wait to be of service to you!
The BS7B team.”
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